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It's Time to Ditch the Self-Pity and Learn How to Develop Self-Acceptance the SMART Way


We do the best we can...given the circumstances and our knowledge and capabilities at the time. It is my fundamental belief that most people always try to do what they think is the right thing to do. I know I do! It is what makes acceptance possible.

Sometimes life fails us. Sometimes we fail life. Women tend to blame themselves or others when life goes sideways.

Accepting our humanity opens our minds and our souls to accept other's humanityLife happens.... sometimes for the best and sometimes we are disappointed. We are human beings working our “tooshes” off to please our bosses, our families and ourselves. We are doing our best and when we aren’t it is because we are overwhelmed, we don’t have the skills or we don’t have the information to “do better.”

Most people try to make the best decision they can with the information they have at the time with the intention of improving someone’s life or the situation. I do not believe most people try to hurt another person. They may be selfish and not thinking about how their behavior will affect you but they are not out to get you, or me or anyone. This is especially helpful as we look back at our parents, our teachers, our coaches, and our managers. We need to give them some leeway.

In the past, I admit that I have at times blamed others for my problems. As I have learned, I am the one bringing my past resentments and memories with me. I have the choice to make another decision. 

I have the choice to live for today. No matter what circumstances you came from you, you are responsible for how you react to them. Make a decision in the present to be different from your past is easily the single best piece of advice I have used to move on from feeling like a victim or feeling like I do not have any choices. We all have a story. Many of us were loved and wanted and many were in very bad situations. We can all choose to have hopeful futures.

As Dr. Phil says, “Sometimes you have to rise above your raising”.  And some of us need to rise above our situation at work, or with our family or friends, or with ourselves, most importantly with ourselves.

Learning to accept who you are, allows you to authentically ask for what you need. You are a human being who is complex, deep, thoughtful, with some regrets and full of hope.

Let’s support one another to Stand Up, Speak Up and Power Up. Let’s acknowledge what is happening in our lives and Stand Up to commit to  “I want a promotion,” “This has to stop,” “I want more in my life,” “It is not okay,” “I made a mistake and I am ready to change,” “I deserve to take the time to get healthy.”  Speak Up in a proactive and productive manner to get what you want and what you need. Power Up by developing a lifestyle to stay true to yourself.

Self-Acceptance opens the pathway to positive pivots. Small tweaks can lead you to knowing that you are a powerful lovable human being who deserves to live the life of her dreams.

Imperfectly Yours,


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